


a good start to the day

by symphonyine



Category: Dangan Ronpa, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: F/M, Gen, Humor, Multi, also implied???one-sided????togafuka, also naegi only cameos sorry, cussing because togami is not a morning person, for the record i am pro-choice and there is absolutely no social commentary intended, mentions of togami/kirigiri/naegi, mild spoilers for both DR and SDR2, more crack than shippy tbh, post SDR2 endgame, togami knocks back caffeine like it's alcohol, togiri is the main ship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-28
Updated: 2014-01-28
Packaged: 2018-01-10 09:16:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1157904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/symphonyine/pseuds/symphonyine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Togami finishes off the last of the Future Foundation's coffee supply, and it's all Kirigiri's fault.</p>
            </blockquote>





	a good start to the day

Togami was most definitely not a morning person. This was one of the first things most people who live in close proximity with him learn and have to adjust to, along with the barbed and fully-intentional remarks lacing his conversations (if they can be called such) and the general attitude of sanctimony and superiority. Had such habits and his lack of morning enthusiasm been completely unrelated, the world would generally be a much more peaceful and harmonious place; unfortunately, instead of being the dead-on-his-feet kind of not-a-morning-person, Togami simply got nastier and more vocal before he’d had at least three mugs of coffee (freshly roasted, premium beans imported from Ethiopia, black, no sugar and no cream, because it gave him indigestion). 

Kirigiri was more than familiar with nastier-than-normal-morning-Togami, which immediately put Togami on edge when she was the first to approach him. 

“No Foundation talk until after 8.30,” he snapped at her before she had even sat down. “I don’t care if one of the ex-Despairs woke up, I don’t care if they’re back to being infernal despair-inducing trigger-happy chaos-spreading lunatics, I don’t care if they’re burning down state of the art equipment or orphan-filled hospitals and pet shelters while inundated with idiocy and morphine, fuck the fuck off.”

“I’m pregnant.”

Togami took a very long sip.

“I believe it’s yours.”

Togami took another three long sips. “I said I can’t deal with bullshit at this time of the day.” He refused to acknowledge the crack in his voice. 

“It’s not bullshit, Togami. You know me.” Kirigiri was surveying his face clinically, almost as if she had merely described reports of another area in need of Foundation help. 

“Apparently not, because it seems you’re just another obnoxious, inconsiderate cretin in need of a better sense of humour and a wall to smack your head into so as to shock your meager brain cells back to life. Rather disappointing really,” Togami snarled, slamming his mug (inlaid with real gold and mother of pearl, along with the family crest) viciously on the table top and shoving his chair back (but not savagely; Togami Byakuya was refined and elegant, unlike certain other scum).

“And apparently you’re even more heartless than I expected,” Kirigiri murmured, watching dispassionately as he scrabbled around the communal kitchen for more coffee. “I thought you’d changed.”

“Please wait another five hours and ten cups of coffee. Until then I have reverted to base state. All character growth will only kick in after there is enough caffeine in my system.” 

“I suppose I must rethink my proposal,” she sighed into her cup - full cream milk, he wanted to slap the disgusting beverage out of her hands - wait, proposal? “Why couldn’t Naegi have been the father? He’ll still be a better husband and father than you anyway, biological or not.”

Togami turned around, so agonisingly slowly, he could hear his own joints creak. The world was fucking standing still and he was impossibly irate. “You’re serious.”

Kirigiri raised an eyebrow. “I told you. I wouldn’t joke about this.”

“It’s my kid. You want to marry me. We’re going to start a family. Abort the baby.”

Kirigiri pursed her lips. “I don’t want to.”

“Don’t be a fucking moron. Think of all the complications. Think of the kind of world we live in right now and the kind of lives we’re leading. If you keep the baby, the baby will die and we will die and then the world will die because we’re probably the only two people left on this planet with any semblance of intelligence and sanity.”

“Ah, the great Togami, failing in logic,” Kirigiri half-sang, and he wanted to tear his hair out. And his nerves. Maybe hers too. “That was a thoroughly unconvincing argument. I want to keep the baby because it’s ours. New life, new hope?”

“ARE YOU SURE IT’S NOT NAEGI’S KID. Where is he anyway, why am I dealing with this alone?”

“He’s not here because this is between us.”

“It was a consensual threesome!”

“But there’s only one father and according to the tests it’s you. Don’t be so skeptical all the time, try some optimism.”

“You’re starting to talk like Naegi, I’m pretty sure this is actually Naegi’s kid. And Touko - or rather Syo would have my head.” He shuddered, “No, she probably wouldn’t be that kind.”

“You know I’m not against orgies,” Kirigiri smirked, spreading her hands in a “well?” gesture. Togami hated her. 

“You are insufferable. I once regarded you as a less inferior specimen of sentient life; now I see you are second only to Junko as far as wretched existences are to be judged. I will not stand for this asininity.”

Kirigiri’s gaze changed, and for the first time, she looked... sad. There was a palpable change in the atmosphere, and Togami suddenly found himself extremely uncomfortable pinned into place by her eyes (a cause for grudging, whinging admiration). “This isn’t asinine, Togami. Do you honestly think I would say the things I’ve said if I didn’t feel anything? Don’t lose the little compassion you’ve learnt. Think about everything you could stand to gain, instead of focusing on worst-case scenarios. One simple word could be all it takes to brighten up the stingy, dismal life you’ve been leading. Just say yes... Byakuya,” she whispered, putting her hand over his. 

They sat in a silence so thick a thousand Junkos might despair trying to cut it, watching as Kirigiri traced the back of his hands idly, waiting for either to speak up. 

Well, for Togami to speak up. His mind had pretty much blanked out, and was going into back-up mode. Safe mode. There was a word for it. Error 404. He hated Kirigiri. Was he supposed to call her Kyouko now? No. Nonononono. 

“Hey guys,” Naegi smiled sleepily, making for the counter. Hot chocolate and marshmallows as always. Kirigiri murmured a greeting, but Togami ignored him. There were more pressing matters at hand. Stupid Naegi. Stupid Kirigiri. 

“I think I broke him,” Kirigiri said aloud. 

“I am not broken,” Togami said, sounding every inch his usual confident self.

“Whoa, you really did,” Naegi said, mouth open and eyes wide in awe. “I guess I owe you fifty then. What did you say to him?”

**Author's Note:**

> A birthday present for my irl bestie, tumblr user bladeanddragon, I hope you like it!
> 
> Written in one setting, also for the record I am pro-choice and there is unironically absolutely zero social commentary intended in this fic.


End file.
